THERE WAS a time when Caroline was really sweet. She came, touched your hand, lifted your spirits, was kind to your parents (“old soul” as they used to say) and always left you wanting more. In fact, for several years, the good times never seemed so good. She made you smile and made life fun even when you were struggling.
Then, unfortunately, Caroline turned sour for some reason. Perhaps bored of seeing only you, she began meeting other people and soon was rendering the same service to them. She touched their hand. She lifted their spirits. She left them wanting more. After a while, to your surprise and disappointment, Caroline became almost unrecognizable. It seemed cheaper by her own desire to be popular and to please people, her words no longer carried the weight of the old truth, or even part of the truth. Now, whenever you heard them, you rolled your eyes and told her to hurry up and get on with it.
Still, you listened to Caroline. You took her back. You believed her lies. You pretended that she remained loyal to you even though he knew better, and you pretended not to get bored with her, if only to delay the inevitable silence of letting go.
However, you also accepted the fact that she was sloppy now, both in appearance and punctuality. If she recovered at all, she came later than planned, at which point you were either in bed or wished she’d turned around, and when she tried to call to apologize, you felt justified in turning off the phone, rolling over, and pretending she never did. you have not met.
Now, to get along, you have to be one of the following: be with her in public at a party, or drunk, or both. Otherwise, you can’t help but see her as she is. Big flirt. Attention seeker. Someone whose time has passed.
Indeed, looking at her today, you will see someone who is limited to posting selfies in the bathroom, hooking up an OnlyFans account, flogging CBD oil online, flying to the Middle East for “work”, battling Twitch streamers on Misfits shows and preaching to people who she calls “followers” with basic Instagram haikus. In other words, it fits now. He is, like seemingly half the population, barking and seeking attention and showing no sign of weakness. That’s why her dad, Neil, really needs to catch her and bring her back home.
David Diamante’s Scream (Billie Weiss/Getty Images)
Until that happens, we boxing fans continue to tolerate Caroline, and if we’re in her company, we sing and dance to her tune. After all, hearing it still usually means something good is on its way, even if the wait for it has been punishing and long.
For example, last weekend while waiting for Katie Taylor and Chantelle Cameron to finally step into the ring, the sound of “Sweet Caroline” at the 3Arena in Dublin was both welcome and irritating, and one’s impressions were completely affected by the vantage point at the time . It seemed to those present that it restored their energy and stimulated them enough to make sure they stayed upright. For others, like me, watching, waiting, and withering at home had the opposite effect. For me, lying horizontally on the sofa, it was kick in the balls foreplay; correct area but bad execution.
Of course, it’s not Caroline’s fault because she’s just a name in a song. But hearing that particular name and that particular song around 11 p.m. on a Saturday night doesn’t have the same impact as an afternoon game of soccer, rugby, or any other sport that has drawn her away from boxing over the years and sold her the advantages of a polyamorous relationship. . At this time, it’s an irritating reminder of how backward boxing is as a sport and why he kicked Caroline, his first love.
At 11 o’clock you need something special to keep you awake and neither Caroline nor the many fights we look forward to can be regarded as such anymore. Even Taylor vs. Cameron, despite his undoubted excellence, was a test of determination, and usually when supporting such a fight you will find a card that only further tests that determination; asking you all the time, “How much do you really want to watch the main event?”
O2 Arena during the Anthony Joshua vs Jermaine Franklin match on April 1, 2023 (Dave Thompson Matchroom Boxing)
Thanks to companies like Matchroom, the UK event experience has never been better and there is something to be said for the role Caroline herself played in this. However, a private event enjoyed only by attendees kind of negates efforts to market the benefits and appeal of boxing to a wider audience. I mean, it’s fine to have fun in the arena, but if half the audience is at home either sleeping watching Match of the dayor annoyed to see you having fun, perhaps something has gone wrong.
What’s more, I found that last weekend’s double-match involving Taylor v Cameron and Devin Haney v Vasiliy Lomachenko had a problem that I just couldn’t shake off, no matter how hard I tried. While both of these fights were exciting, both on paper and in reality, my anticipation for them was negatively affected by the 99.9% certainty that both would go the distance.
This, I admit, is often a problem when preparing to watch a women’s fight, especially when the boxers are elite level and well matched, and persists for obvious reasons: Boxers aren’t as naturally strong as their male counterparts, and two-minute rounds often make they feel like they’re running out of time. But the same expectation was the same before Haney vs. Lomachenko, a two-man fight rarely associated with fast or even finishers, which I realized made me appreciate so much of the beauty of boxing – true The beauty is in the potential for drama and the potential for it all to end in the blink of an eye. This ultimately keeps tired eyes open and makes Caroline’s sound a little more bearable. Otherwise, if you’re just watching the unavoidable game at an unholy hour, being cruelly teased all night long, you start to feel a frustration and impatience that only the last bell can remedy. Also, if you’re anything like me, you start imagining a world where “Sweet Caroline” is replaced by the Beach Boys’ famous song, “Caroline, No.”
Fans take photos and videos of Ryan Garcia ahead of his fight with Gervonta Davis at the T-Mobile Arena on April 22, 2023 in Las Vegas, Nevada (Al Bello/Getty Images)
